I always needed time on my own

I never thought I'd need you there when I cry

And the days feel like years when I'm alone

And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take

Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone

The pieces of my heart are missing you

When you're gone

The face I came to know is missing too

When you're gone

The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok

I miss you

I miss you

It has been ages sice i've updated my blog. Work is reli holding me bac from writing at my lame blog. When im off im always out wif my family n frens dat it makes it so fuckin hard 2 me 2 hav sme time 4 me myself and i. Currently im at my room with a sudden depression of a teenage girl cuz out of a sudden i feel dat im FUCKIN UGLY!!! I dunno how 2 explain this bt my self confidence is goin very low. I mean u can tell urself dat u can outdo urself everyday. bt reality isnt reli d same. Its nt easy 2 outdo urself. I am so jealous of so masny things dat i cant get or obtain. N smetimes d worlds worst loser can bring me down like a hammer nailing a fuckin rusted nail. I noe dis depression is gonna b temporary bt im sure dat it will happen again n again until i outdo myself. I dont alweays look happy all d time on d outside..... n im sure dat no1 will ever read dis post so it makes me easier 2 4get dis temporary lack of self confidence.

Pelabuhan KoteAnak

Currently i dunno wat 2 blog so i would just tell but d pd trip dat i went on last saturday. It was Nicole's burfday so we decided 2 go 2 Port DICKson. It was a very last minute thingy n oni a few came. Me, Main, Naga, Eshia, Jes n Que. We had so much of fun. We left at 12 from Subang n reached the beach around 1.30. The beach was the one where Anissa stayed. It was quite cold n quiet n luckily there were not any Rempits or paria there. Had so much of fun. Me Que n Eshia went skinny dipping 4 d 1st time!!! lol.... All tanx 2 Andrew. Went back home at around 5 something n arrived at my house at 7. I told Andrew dat at 7 u could hear d birds chirping d sky is cool n nice. Wat a great way 2 start d day. Unfortunately useless people like us are ending d day. Lol!!! Went 2 work d next day n continued my working n boring life. Dats all 4 now. Ciao......

Work

My god!! i'm finally updating my blog afta centuries.... I nvr knew dat work could make me so tired n bz. Working at Marks n Spencer is quite fun. It is never dat stressfull compared 2 workin at other clothing shop. My co-workers r freindly n i nvr experience such major prob. I met so many new customers and it reli tought me a lot of stuff. In a way it kinda help me 2 prepare 4 Mass Comm. I love 2 layan customers who hav babies or small kids. Those toddlers reli do make up my long n tiring day. Unfortunately, working reli does cut my social life. Today is my off day n im bloggin from iffah's hse. Kinda miss her.... She helped me make a bank account 2day. lol!!! i tink im done blogging 4 now

CIAO....

lol...=)

On Sunday my dad n mom told me 2 get a job or stay at home n stop askin 4 money. Obviously i had 2 choose d 1st 1. I would die stayin at home n nt havin money 2 go out!!! Anyways called eisha n she told me dat there was a vacancy at FUCKSON. Went there 2 ask 4 d job bt the manager wasnt there. Then Eisha followed me 2 Mark's n Spencer n she forced me 2 apply there. Now Thevanesh is a temporary salesman at Mark's n Spencer...haha!!! I nevr knew that working at 1 shop could b quite tiring. D co-workers r fine n my supervisor is haha...nice!! So far only Dila n Eisha visited me at work. Had 2 sacrifice a lot 4 mobney. 4 instance no more clubbing!!! haha...ill learn hw 2 live without it.

G2g now...FULL SHFT 2MORO!!!

911106

Since I could not go out wif my parents yesterday, i decided 2 celebrate my burfday wif my frens instead at Republic Bar. A few of my coll n skl frens came yesterday. I had so much of fun yesterday bt d rest just had 2 stand me acting stupid annoying n rude cuz i was so FUCKIN DRUNK!!! D last thing dat i remembered is dat i was at Itialanese n d next day i woke up in my house. WTF rite??? Thank God Raga Nisha Nicole n Andrew Ryan n Sean were there 2 bring me back home. Woke up wif a massive hangover n could not get out of d bed until 4. Anywayz i would like 2 tank all of you guys 4 cmin cmin last nite. Sori 4 d trouble dat i caused. N i would like 2 thank Daryl n Mira 4 callin me yesterday. U guys reli did make up my day. Miss u guys!!(gay)

2 those who actually read my lame blog sori 4 nt updating 4 so long. Hav been very bz wif tests n all d college bullshit. From October 30th till d 1st week of November I will be having my finals. Therefore i cnt reli go out much from today onwards. So im reli sori if i didnt hav d chance 2 meet any of you guys. I promise i'll make it up 2 u guys 1 day.....

G2G NOW!!
CIAO....

sori 4 not bein able 2 blog 4 sme time.... hav been bz wif a lot of test n my finals is at d end of dis month. I noe my life sucks!!!

Anywayz.... i just came here 2 wish every1 a VERY HAPI DIWALI!!!!
I'm not doin an open hse dis yr unfortunately.....balik kampung 4 a few days oni.
Thats all 4 now....
CIAO...............

Girls

Uh huh
Life's like this
Uh huh, uh huh
That's the way it is
'Cause life's like this
Uh huh, uh huh
That's the way it is

Chill out, what you yellin' for?
Lay back, it's all been done before
And if, you could only let it be
You will see

I like, you the way you are
When we're drivin' in your car
And you're, talkin' to me one on one
But you become

Somebody else
'Round everyone else
Your watchin' your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin' to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no

You come over unannounced
Dressed up, like you're somethin' else
Where you are ain't where it's at you see
You're makin' me

Laugh out, when you strike a pose
Take off, all your preppy clothes
You know, you're not foolin' anyone
When you become

Somebody else
'Round everyone else
Your watchin' your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin' to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no
(No no no)
No no
(No no no)
No no
(No no no)
No no

Ooh, chill out, what you yellin' for?
Lay back, it's all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see

Somebody else
'Round everyone else
Your watchin' your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin' to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this, you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
(Yea yea)
I see the way you're actin' like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no

updates

Sori 4 nt bloggin 4 a long time. Hav been lazy dis few days so here's pretty much wat had happened over the weekend.

Thursday : Maisons wif Nicole, Ling n Eisha. Had fun over there. Met Adam.
Friday : Did oral presentation wif a slight hangover. Ms Helen said i did well.
Saturday: Shane died. Reasons unknown. Went 2 digi birthday bash. Got high!!!!!
Sunday: Went swimming wif Nicole n Jeswena. Studied 4 econs topic test.
Today: Went 2 Sue burfday party. Met Anissa and afta so long met Nanda!!!

Sori 4 not elaborating. I'm so fuckin lazy rite now. Mood gone cuz of d stupid letter i recieved from Sunway.
Ciao.....

Finns

Today Mufy moral studies students had their moral community service sale. My group was sellin cupcakes and a drink. It's not actually interestiing but we managed 2 collect a lot of money. During the sale the group next 2 us was doin a fishing game. I paid and I asked Nisha 2 catch 4 me. She caught 2 fish 4 me. (Awwww!!!!).1 was a goldfish while the other looks like 1 of those fish which has a misai. I named 2 gold fish Papi and the other 1 Shane. Both names are the characters of the lesbian playgirls in L word. I named the goldfish Papi bcuz it always moved its mouth and in LWord Papi was a very good kisser. I named d other 1 Shane bcuz itr was very skinny and it look good in a weird way just like Shane. I hope dis fish will live as long as possible. 2 of Nisha's fishes died. Haih... For d 1st time im actually takin care of living things which has zero intelect. Went out with Nicole and Eleena 4 sisha 2day. I think i hav dis addiction 4 sisha which is soooo unhealthy. Nvm its my body!! Anyways im running out of things 2 say....

Ciao..

Ethylchloride

Yesterday me, murtad,juria n nissa got high with ethylchloride a.k.a. Laughin gas. We were laughin all nte long like some mental assholes!! I've nvr laughed dat much in ages. Anissa was d funniest amongst all. She made dis WOOT!! sound everytime she laughed. She was so fuckin cute last nite. Tanx u guys 4 forcing me 2 cme last minute. t was definately a better nite than BLACK EYED PEAS!!!

Ciao...

i've got a feelin...

Finally met kotek kecik afta so long. Fucker just left college without even saying goodbye at all. Had fun chillin at his hse without gettin high or damaging d brain cells. 4 more days 2 go. Till then im gonna try my best to resist all d temptations dat are given 2 me. Iffah called me 2 cyberjaya bt i was at my grandma's hse. Ainaa ask me 2 go 2 rainforest 2nite bt i said no cuz im broke. So i guess 2nite i would most probably chill at hme while d others go 2 black eyed peas concerts maisons n all d fun shits. 2moro i might go 2 liyana's open hse. Hopefully dapat duit raya (MATA DUITAN!!).

Ciao...

btw y isnt d anonymous hater commenting anymore?

Till we meet again...

Yesterday i went 2 amira's and iffah's hse 4 raya. It was great 2 c all d old skl frens sme whom i've nvr seen in ages like chris nayim n zahir. Afta dat i went 2 d airport 2 send Mira 2 russia. WTF!!! 1 kampung of people came 2 send her. Including her frens 10 cars came 2 send her off at KLIA. I think 4 1nce KLIA wasnt reli so empty. I felt sad 4 her but thank god i didnt cry bcuz its quite hard 2 feel sad in front of a chilay bitch. Haih... i didnt even get 2 hug her goodbye bcuz her family members were there. Left d airport at 12 smeting and headed straight 2 que's hse just 2 hang out. Came back home at 5.30. I'm sure that by nxt yr at least 80% of my frens wont b in subang anymore while i'll b stuck in sunway till i grow old.

List of old frens

Daryl-Russia

Amira-Russia

Guna-Nilai

Nadia-Sunway

Juria- Damansara

Shera-Sunway

Nina-Sunway

Nicole-Taylors

Dee-Taylors

Ainaa-Kedah

Iffah-Perak

Now oni 45% of my frens are easily reachable. By next year d numbers may decrease even more. Well dats life. Hopefully i wont be stuck at subang 4eva. But until then i just have 2 accept wat is given 2 me.

Ciao...

Emo Gothic

Its a normal tuesday morning and instead of goin out of my room and havin a breakfast im in it with all curtains closed like some emo gothic staring at my laptop d whole day. A lot of things hav happen 2 me in d past few days but i dont wish 2 talk bout them now. Later i might b goin 2 Mira's hse 4 raya n it might b d last time i c her till nxt years summer. I hav catch up wif a lot of high skl frens who were always bz wif their everyday lives que, pacad, rachel, guna. I remember d times where we used 2 hang out all d time. Haih.... Times have changed indeed.

K g2g now...
CIAO...

freedom!!

Afta i whole week of test n stupid assignments i am finally free tanx 2 d raya break...
Went 2 Daryl's hse last nite n finally finished d bottle of vodka dat we bought when we went MOS 3 months ago. lol....
I was planning 2 go 2 Poppy 2day 4 neesha's burfday bt i totally 4got dat i was fasting so i cant b naughty until Monday d 28th...
I think dats all 4 now...


Ciao....

*BTW there is dis annoying human who keeps on mocking me but nvr revealed their identity...haih GROW SOME BALLS LA!!!

temporarily unactive

Due to all d assignments and test i wont b active for some time until my raya break. Haih... NOW I FUCKIN HATE COLLEGE!!!

Till raya break, Ciao..

Finally sme new stuff

Yesterday when i opened my blog i read a hate mail from an anonymous bastard. Iwas angry at first but then i realised it was my blog's first despise mail. Finally there is smeting 2 make my lame blog interesting. Im so used to it even in my daily life so a few hate mails in my blog won't do much difference. I guess im just Malaysia's most hated. So 2 whoever you are who is tryin 2 bring me down. Pls carry on... LOL!!!

Ciao..

L WORD

Girls in tight dresses

Who drag with mustaches

Chicks drivin' fast

Ingenues with long lashes

Women who long, love, lust

Women who give

This is the way

It’s the way that we live

Talking, laughing, loving, breathing,fighting, fucking, crying, drinking,riding, winning, losing, cheating,kissing, thinking, dreaming.

This is the way

It’s the way that we live

It’s the way that we live

And love

Maafkan Daku

I noe dis sounds stupid but i shouldnt hav called u last nite and said dat i missed u...
Truth b told i missed u...
But u noe dat there is no hope btween us...
I'm sori if d call last nite gav u hope or made u sad...
I'm such a fuckin jerk n dat is all i'll ever be...
I guess im no different from all those other guys at all...
N i totally understand if u wanna hate me in any way dat is possible...
i just wanna say I'M SORRY..